Celebrating One Year Of Wedded Bliss

This weekend my husband, Mark, and I celebrated our first year of marriage. 

Our anniversary was Sunday, November 9th, but that didn't stop us from being super cheesy all weekend long. Saturday morning I made Mark a breakfast sandwich before leaving the house and left him a little morning message to start his day. I also left him a laminated copy of our vows on the windshield of his truck to remind him of how appreciative I am for him and everything he does for me. I have a copy of his vows taped to the side of my computer monitor at work. I enjoy reading them from time to time to remind me of the wonderful things he promised me on our wedding day. 

My parents also joined in the festivities and decorated my place at the kitchen room table with boxes of our favorite Sees candy, a card, and balloons on my chair. In the card my parents invited us to dinner in honor of our first year as a married couple. We went to a fabulous sushi dinner at our favorite little shop in Orange called Hanabi. That was a very sweet, unexpected treat from my parents that Mark and I appreciated greatly. 

The traditional first wedding anniversary gift is paper. The modern first wedding anniversary gift is clocks. I decided to implement both of these gift ideas into our anniversary this year. I wanted to keep the theme of time, so I wrapped the box in brown shipping paper and wrote a simple message on the outside. 

Once he unwrapped the package, he opened a box and saw a handmade card I created with the picture of a watch on it. Once again, sticking with the time theme, I wrote a line about how I've loved every MINUTE that we've been married. (The time on the clock is 3pm—which is the time we got married.)

Inside the card I went on to write a novel (like I always do) about how much I love him and how I can't wait to grow old together—of course meaning I want him by my side as I age, not that I am in a hurry to get old. 

Here is a picture of the faux-leather watch display case I bought him from Wolf, along with the beautiful bouquet of long stem red roses he brought home for me on Saturday evening. Mark was so excited about his watch case. He has been wanting one for several years. He loves watches, but hates having to leave them in their original box. This awesome box comes with a lock and key and was purchased from Nordstrom, so if anything ever goes wrong I can replace it. 

The watch case and time inspired gifts accounted for the "clocks" portion of our anniversary, but the traditional gift is paper. I took it upon myself to put an ad in the Celebrations section of the Orange County Register wishing Mark a happy one year anniversary. I used a picture from our wedding with my grandfather and late grandmother who passed away suddenly this year. Mark was very surprised and loved the idea!

My gift was a complete surprise! I came out to sit at the kitchen table to eat breakfast with the grandfather and was greeted with every woman's favorite blue box...

I couldn't get a good picture of it on me (around my neck), so here is the stock photo. Mark got me this sterling silver heart lock pendant on a necklace from Tiffany & Co. I was very surprised because most years I will mention something that I want or need, but this year I let him completely come up with something on his own. I absolutely love it! 

This is the top of our wedding cake. Mark's dad, Michael, bought a special bag to store the cake in, in their deep freezer. The cake was a blush pink and the frosting was designed to look like feathering or petals. It has become slightly distorted from the freezing process, but it was still in good condition. I can't say that it tasted great, but it was definitely edible. The inside is chocolate with fudge filling. 

Mark planned a nice, relaxing day for us at Irvine Park. We took a bike ride around the park with Domino, had a picnic on the park tables, fed the ducks in the pond (which Domino fell into), and frolicked around in the grass. 

That night Mark planned a surprised dinner for us at Morton's Steakhouse. We don't typically wine and dine ourselves at fancy restaurants so this was definitely a treat. We were greeted with custom menus that wished us a happy one year anniversary. It was a very thoughtful touch!

We started with a "tuna tower" which is equivalent to an poke stack at many other restaurants; however this was the tastiest one I have ever had!!! This appetizer is layered with avocado, mango salsa, some type of grains, and seared ahi tuna. They fried their own chips which are used to scoop up this delicious, chilled treat. 

 Mark ordered a bowl of lobster bisque wit his dinner. It was super thick and creamy with large chunks of lobster. 

I ordered a Cesar salad with my dinner. This starter salad was surprisingly large and tastefully satisfying. 

I decided to go big or go home! I ordered a 2 pound lobster which was pre-cracked and ready to devour. Although the content that is actually eaten is no where near 2 pounds, this was still delightful! The taste was rich and flavorful just as I had imagined. I was extremely happy with my choice—even at market price. Eeek!

Mark, being the carnivore that he is, ordered a porterhouse steak. This I obviously did not taste, but he seemed to be enjoying every single bite. The steak was so large he wasn't even able to finish it. Leftovers = I don't have to cook. Yay!

Morton's treated us with a free chocolate souffle in honor of our anniversary. This was so sweet and so yummy!

We had such a great day! I am so thankful I am married to the greatest man. He makes me happier than words could ever explain. I am one lucky lady!

Six Months *March 24, 2014*

It was an average Monday morning. I had been at work for about three hours when my phone started ringing. I was on my way to our warehouse (which is where the ladies room is located) and I saw it was my dad calling me. My dad isn't a huge fan of talking on the phone, plus he doesn't typically bother me at work unless it is important, so I hurried to the back of the warehouse and answered. My dads voice was quite and subdued. 

Let's backup for a second... Up until this point, I had three living grandparents. My maternal grandfather died in 2008 due to complications from a previous heart surgery. His wife, my grandmother, has always been a rather sickly woman and after the death of her husband, her health began to steadily decrease. She married my grandfather when she was just 16 years old and—although she would never admit it—the stress from my grandfathers passing slowly took over and soon her body and mind began to deteriorate. She was diagnosed with dementia and had been living in an assisted living facility in Arizona for the last year. When I would visit she would look right through me as if I were a ghost. It was difficult to engage her in a conversation or to obtain a cohesive response. We knew it was only a matter of time before her body gave out, just like her mind had. My other two grandparents were my dads mother and father. They lived one street over from me while I was growing up. They would regularly take me or pick me up from school, attend school functions, and have us over for dinner. My grandmother has always been unashamedly opinionated and verbally expressive almost to a fault. She wasn't always the easiest person to get along with. My grandfather is a military man and engineer—the quite type, an observer. He goes with the flow and doesn't rock the boat. My grandmother has always been overweight and struggled with diabetes, but other than that both of them have been seemingly healthy. Recently she had been eating better—still refusing to excersie—and her diabetes seemed to be under control. I had spoken with her about two weeks prior and she seemed to be doing fine. Mark and I were planning to head up there in the next few weekends to visit. 

With a solemn tone, my dad said, "your grandma died". Obviously I wasn't expecting him to utter those words when I picked up the phone, so my first reaction was, "wait... what? How? What happen?". My dad is the strongest person I know. He is generally composed and acts as the backbone to our family. But this time, he sounded different...broken, somber, defeated. I had never heard him sound so melancholy. I was positive he was referring to my mothers mom—afterall, she was living in a constant state of unknown and we could only imagine the abundance of anxiety she must be in. Suddenly, something clicked, "which grandma?!" I asked. It took him a few seconds to get the words out. "My mom", he replied. I immediately went into denial/shock mode. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. She had been laughing and loving life at my wedding just four months earlier. We'd spoken on the phone and gone up there to see her recently and everything seemed fine—she was FINE! I had so many questions, but I couldn't even speak. I was overwhelmingly overcome with sadness and grief. I could barely move. I made my way to bathroom where I could get some privacy and compose myself. A few minutes later I resurfaced and I knew I needed to head home and be with my family. 

I didn't actually consider myself close with my paternal grandparents until about 8 years ago. I think when they moved away to Hemet, CA and weren't centrally located to their entire family, they (my grandmother, in particular) realized the importance of family and how much they missed seeing us as frequently as they used to. Mark and I started making recurrent trips to Hemet on the weekends to visit with them. My grandma and I started calling each other fairly often to catch up on life. Her and I became very close and in the years leading up to her death she would cry every time we hung up the phone. On several occasions I would ask her why she was upset and she would reply, "because I love you so much". I think it was a combination of happiness that she was able to witness my life come together—I had graduated college, got engaged, got a new job, and got married. But I also think she recognized that she was getting older and that her time to share with the ones she loved was limited.

It has been six months since she left us and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of her. Sometimes I do get angry that she couldn't still be here to witness me have children and continue living my life with Mark. She wanted to be a great-grandmother in the worst way. I feel guilty that I couldn't give her that. I have to constantly remind myself that I am lucky to have had the close relationship with her that I did. She loved me so much and was excessively proud of me and the woman I have become. I am fortunate that she was able to attend my wedding, my bridal shower, my graduation from high school and college, etc. Grandparents aren't supposed to be in your life forever. They are there to show you a different kind of love—a love you learn from and are forever grateful for. I still cry when I sit on my bed at night and stare at her luminous face in a picture of my wedding that hangs by my nightstand. I don't even enjoy meat, but I still get hungry for her infamous fried chicken when I drive by a KFC because I know I will never have it again. I still eat egg-on-toast for breakfast sometimes, in honor of my favorite meal she would make me before taking me to school as a child. 

It hasn't been easy on anyone—especially this guy...

BUT, we have managed to pull through as a family and retain some sort of normalcy. My grandfather has moved back to Orange, CA and my mom and I bring him dinner 2-3 times a week. He also comes over every Sunday morning for a "he-man" breakfast. Moving local has helped my grandpa cope with the loss of his wife. He spends a lot of time with friends and family. As my last surviving grandparent, I have never been so grateful to have him in my life as I have for the past six months. 

*Two months (almost to the day) after my paternal grandmother passed away, my maternal grandmother also passed away. Can 2015 be a better year, please?

Mark's 29th Birthday Celebration

"Life should not only be lived—it should be celebrated!"

On August 28th, my husband entered the final year of his 20's. His birthday was on a Thursday so most of the day was business as usual, but I made sure to pamper him any and every way possible.

He started out his morning with homemade "birthday pancakes" and eggs! These pancakes are made with Bisquick batter and colorful heart sprinkles. I topped them off with cinnamon roll icing, which I melted and added sprinkles to. He was in heaven!

He then headed off to work, where he received a HAPPY BIRTHDAY text from me each hour. When he got home he showered and got ready for dinner at Lucille's BBQ in Orange. We were joined by my parents and youngest brother, his parents and two sisters, and our close friends, Jen Jen, Brian, and Ruthie. We enjoyed fried pickles, Irish nachos, potato skins, and much more. We had so much fun!

We finished the night off at our house where everyone gathered and enjoyed carrot cake (courtesy of the family chef—Michael Aimola) and Costco vanilla ice cream. My husband is a true child at heart and can't hide his excitement when opening presents. From me, he received a trip to Glen Ivy, a stack of his favorite candy, a new travel mug, and Dunkin' Donuts coffee for our Keurig. His parents gave him 5 tickets to a Red Wings hockey game in February. Mark is a lover of hockey and has been a Red Wings fan since childhood. I am not a huge hockey fan—and by "not a huge fan" I mean it's my least favorite sport—but I can't wait to go and cheer them on with my man. His sisters both gave him cash—you can't go wrong with that! My parents gave him a Milwaukee power drill that he had been eyeing and our friends so generously pitched in and helped fund our Glen Ivy spa day. We love you all and had so much fun celebrating with you. 

A note to Mark: I hope you had a very happy birthday! You work so hard to make sure all of my dreams come true and I don't tell you enough how much I appreciate everything you do for me. We have everything when we have each other and I am so fortunate to have you by my side. As you enter the final year of your 20's and embark on a new journey that will be your 30's, I want you to rest-assure that I will always be by your side to love, encourage, and support you. I can't wait to see what the future has in store for us. I. love. you. 

The Walk

"The sad thing is, we spend the first half of our lives planning the future, and the second half reliving the past."

Recently I have been a little down on myself. 

We all have those days (or weeks) where we just feel... blah. I consider myself to be a person with great depth and it can be a struggle to contain my emotions at times. The past few months I have let my emotions get the best of me and I began to let my sadness pull me slowly into a depression. 

The word "depression" is so serious and can mean so many things. For me it's having trouble being optimistic when I have the world at my fingertips, it's feeling empty when I have nothing but love and support surrounding me, it's being gently coerced into a feeling of numbness and darkness when my life is generally full of light! In my high school years I struggled with my emotions, but I am proud to say that over the years I have gained sustainable control over them. 

Since I started dating Mark over 7 years ago, I haven't really had any bouts with depression or intense sadness, until this year. I guess my failed interpretation of how my life should be by this point finally caught up with me. I've been having trouble excepting that no matter how hard I work towards my goals—if it isn't the right timing, it isn't going to happen. When I notice the overwhelming sensation of sadness start to creep up on me, I immediately begin doing small, easy things that make me smile. I basque in the simple pleasures life has to offer. For example, I will start taking Domino on longer walks in the evening, cooking more detailed dinners with fresh, flavorful ingredients, and looking through photo albums and reminiscing about the great adventures this life has taken me on. 

Finally, I can continue on to the point of this post! Last week, while I was digging into the past, I found gold! I came across an entry I had written about a year ago and it gave me great satisfaction to revisit this moment in time. 

While walking the dogs, an older man

approached Mark and I.

He said, "you are a great pair!". A little

surprised and very flattered, I

replied,"Well, thank you".

The man then explained, "I

lost my wife about three years ago—I can

finally say that without getting choked up.

We had 37 wonderful years together and it

makes me happy to see two young people in

love who look like they belong together". To

which I replied, "Wow, that is so sweet.

Thank you! We're getting married in

November and I hope we have just as many

wonderful years together as you and your

wife did". He told us, "I hope you have

even more than we did. I wish you a very

long and happy life together".

I thanked him again and as we walked

away, I may have teared up a bit.

He was so genuinely happy for us and

excited for our future. It brought him joy to

see love even though his wife was no longer

alive. It was a beautiful moment.

Returning to this day, I can still see the smile on his face. It made me think about how lucky I actually am. Things are not always going to go my way, but that should be my cue to stop and admire all of the beauty around me. I am grateful for my husband who adores me even when I am a wreck, my dog who loves me unconditionally no. matter. what., my family who continue to support me through even my craziest ideas, my friends who keep me grounded and push me to be a better person, my adventurous streak which has urged me to travel the world and explore, and finally, living in a country that allows me to do all of these things. With everything going on in the world these days it is easy to get sucked into all of the horrible things that happen every single day. My goal is to make a conscious decision—daily—to see the beauty 

in the world, people, and situations, around me. 

#faroeislands